"You All Suck"

I've played several games over the years.  My reasons for giving a particular game a try vary.  It can be boredom, curiosity, or the recommendation of a friend.  Regardless of why I find myself in a particular gaming world though, I always check out a game's official forums.  Forums can be an invaluable tool for teaching a new player some of the finer points to a game.  In my time reading game forums, I've noticed several trends that hold true across nearly every MMO.  I call it the "You all suck" phenomenon.

Please allow me to clarify.  According to online forums, all MMO's have the following in common:

1. The game sucks.  That's right, you heard me.  Every single MMO sucks terribly.  Apparently a good one has never been made.
2. The game used to be better.  Despite the fact that all games suck, there was apparently some point in time at which they didn't suck.   Don't try to wrap your head around this one, you'll just get a headache.
3. The game is dying.  This would seem to be a logical continuation of the first two points.  Every single MMO is dying or nearly dead.  What's that you say?  There are lots of servers in the red and yellow every night?  Doesn't matter, the game's dying dude!
4. The Devs are stupid.  It's hard to be believe, but every forum person will nod sagely that their MMO's developers are just complete morons.  So I guess being a game developer just requires a low IQ and go get'em attitude.
5. The Devs are greedy.  It's not just that the Devs are stupid, you see.  They also have committed the unpardonable sin of wanting to make a living.  I'd like to know at what point it was decided the gaming industry was a nonprofit public service.  I mean it must have been announced somewhere right?

So there you have it, the five traits of every MMO ever made.  They're bad, their Devs are greedy, stupid, and the game has been ruined, which will result in its untimely demise.  But never fret, because hope springs eternal!  Despite all games everywhere all sharing these five traits, the very next MMO that comes out will be the perfect, blissful game.  Their Devs are utter geniuses I tell ya, the game engine is so perfect Microsoft has to pay the Devs for the rights to have their OS run the software, and the Devs are all multi-trillionaires that don't need money to live.  Or so the forum gurus will tell you, anyway.

So the next time you make a journey to the forums for your particular game, remember that the forum community will have a bunch of negative jerks who will be openly offended by the audacity of anyone daring to enjoy their game.  That doesn't mean you should stay away though.  Use the forums to enhance your understanding of your chosen MMO.  As I said, they can be invaluable for that. And there are some fun people to chat with on forums.  Just remember that the You Suck Guys are out there, and against all reason they're determined to hate a game they spend money on every month.  Take anything these jokers say with a grain of salt (OK maybe a 50 pound block of salt would be required; you get the idea.)

Welcome to MMOnster!

I'm an avid gamer that finally broke down and decided to start writing a blog about my experiences in the various digital worlds I find myself inhabiting.  This blog will mention many games, but will not be about any one game.  My intention is to talk about MMO culture, game trends, and whatever the hell else pops into my rattled brains from time to time.

My first article should be up in a few days once I hammer out all the details.  Until then, happy gaming!